Choose To Live, Not Exist | Self Improvement & Personal Growth Mindset

(Read Time 5 min)

Is self improvement, personal growth, or personal development just some trendy topics that people talk about on social media or on YouTube? Or is it truly a life or death situation?

To me, it’s a life or death situation. Here is why…

Look, for the longest time I gave my power away. I gave it to my boss, I gave it to my job, I gave it to my small hometown, I gave it to my “ bad luck,” I gave it to my parents, I gave it to the negative people around me. 

And I kept blaming outside factors, and as I did, I kept experiencing the same struggles and circumstances over and over. 

Then I finally woke up, and I experienced one of the most profound mindset shifts and made the most powerful choice I could have ever made. I chose to take my power back. This choice sent me in a completely new direction along my self improvement journey and in my life. That choice can do the same for you.

Now that I took my power back and stopped giving it to external things, is where the true test of power came. Life then gave me challenges that seemed too great to handle even though I took my power back. That's when I placed my trust in God’s power.

My true power comes from Jesus Christ. From God. Who put me into this world to accomplish something on a scale that is so massive only he can comprehend and only I can carry out with the help and guidance of him. He just wanted me to first take the responsibility over my life, accept the call, so he could then send me on his assignments to build something greater. 

God has such a big call on your life, such a purpose for you. But he gives you a choice, call it free will. He has given you only one thing to control, YOU. That is the biggest test. But giving your power away gives the external world the ability to control you and limit you and keep you outside of living in your purpose.

But what happens when you choose to take your power back and strive to control YOU? You realize the inner power you possess. Life then will continually match who you are being and who you are becoming. And the key word here is becoming…

There are two choices in life, what are they? Exist or Live. Grow or Die. Some people will choose to merely exist instead of live. Some will chose death and merely just exist in the world. But if you choose to live, you will grow. You will become greater.

For me, I believe I have an obligation to wake up every day with a chip on my shoulder to make something great for myself and for the people I love. That can only happen if chose to live and continue to grow and improve myself so that I may bring forth a better life and a better future for those around me and ME!

Because who I was 5 years ago could not handle the responsibilities I have now. And who I am going to be in 5 years could not be handled by who I am now. That's why I must continue to become, to improve myself so that I can build my piece in God’s grand vision through me. 

We just sometimes cling to the struggle that we find ourselves in because it has defined us as who we are. We would rather cling to struggle and comfort rather than engage challenges in the unknown. The cling holds us back. Yet in the struggle, power can be found if you chose to use it for growth rather than let it limit you.

If your circumstances are tough, it may not be your fault. But you better believe it that it is your responsibility to change them and fight like heck until you can. If you life sucks, there is only one person to look to, you. The greater the struggle the bigger the shine if you chose to fight forward and grow. This is why self-improvment isnt just some trendy topic, it a life or death situation. A spiritual life or death situation. Those who say self improvement is ruining your life are lying to you. They are justifying your feelings when you tell yourself this personal growth stuff is too hard. Well it is hard, and you can either settle and conform to the life you have now or change the challenges into opportunities, become greater and create a better life not only for yourself but for those you love.

I truly believe you have been born with a purpose. You have been given a life. You have hit the jackpot.

Now that you hit the jackpot, you have two choices, GROW or DIE. You can either exist or you and truly LIVE. And let me tell you, once I choose to truly live, life became so much more beautiful. Truly living is growing, pushing your own boundaries, learning, serving, and becoming in order for you to expresses yourself at the highest level.

When you accept the call to truly live and grow, you will look at the Unknown strait on. Many then continue to stay stuck and cling to their struggles because of the unknown ahead. There is the fear of unknown - well welcome to nature of life! We must move forward in faith and in courage rather than waiting for all the pieces to be unveiled to us.

For so long I would just pray for clarity, I see this a lot with Christian believers, is that we say that we pray for clarity and clarity and more clarity. When God has given you and I the clarity on the next single step we need to take. I waited around sometimes for years, waiting on more clarity.

When what I really needed was courage. Courage to take that first or next step in the direction God has shown. And once I started taking those next steps, more steps began to become clear. The more I would move, the more God would move. 

There is reason why there are things you love to do and a reason why you have a particular set of skills, gifts, and passions. A reason why you dream of doing this or that, because that is what God wants you to do. He wants you to bring that from mere dreams into a tangible reality. 

That’s the power you have.

So have the courage to step forward, to improve yourself so you can continually bring forth your best self to the world around you as you live out your purpose doing the things you love to do.

Also those who say self improvement has ruined their life or will ruin yours look at self improvement from a finite frame, they strive for perfection, perfection is the lowest standard. They spend more time consuming rather than creating. They want things to happen on their timeline. Self improvement is a never ending infinite practice that is measured by progression not perfection. If God is a creator and he lives within you, that means You are a creator too.

Things happen in God’s perfect timing. If you continue to improve, get into the game of life, you will continually become more prepared and equipped to handle the blessings and the bigger responsibilities aka Blessings that over time that will be released to you.

But they only come, when you improve yourself, prepare, and become greater. 

Its an infinite process, its like trying to plant an acorn and have a solid oak tree a month later. There is a process. A process that prepares you and equips you to becoming and growing into the best version of yourself. 

Some people don’t even plant the acorn and their dreams, aspirations, and living out their purpose never come to be. Or they learn all about oak trees and acorns, and watch videos about oak trees, get motivated about planting acorns, get clear on the vision of the oak tree, yet they never plant they damn acorn. 

Plant the damn acorn, get into the game, stay committed, grow and become who you are meant to become. 

Self-improvment isn’t a one fix all nor all the answers. Jesus, the bible, I believe that is the blueprint. But SELF IMPROVEMENT is the step in the direction of living out your God given gifts and purpose. Its a spiritual evolution. It is taking responsibility over your life and accepting the call you have on your life. It is a must. 

You’ll never reach a point of “peak self improvement achieved” where you are done growing or all your problems and issues just go away. You just have higher challenges that present themselves as obstacles both mentally and in reality that you must overcome.

The higher you go the bigger the challenges. Higher levels, higher devils. But the higher you go, the greater you become just know that the challenges that come with it are the ones that are testing and preparing you in order to go to another level. And the only way to overcome and win those challenges is to get better. 

The seasons in my life where I had the most growth and the most breakthroughs weren't during the times where I sat and watched self-improvement videos or read book after books. But you know what, if you are in a period where you are watching a ton of videos and reading lots of books, thats ok. Some will tell you this is only "mental masterbation" well I disagree.

Sometimes we need it. Sometimes our minds need to be filled with great things. As one of my best buddies likes to say, "The only solution to pollution is dilution." So if you are in the time where you are consuming a ton, that's ok. Dilute the polluted mind.

Yet don't stay on the sidelines forever. Get into the game. Consuming rather than creating is what kept me at a plateau. Do both.

The season where I had the most growth and improvement were the seasons where I didn't read much, I didn't watch any “self-improvement” videos or mindset videos. I actually engaged with the world. I got into the game. It's when I planted the dang acorns, watered them, and I put into practice the good shit that stuck from the books and videos. 

That's the greatest self improvement thing you can do for yourself, take action.

There are lots of different systems, frameworks, challenges, that lots of individuals share and teach. I even share my RISE Process. Try them all then take what works for you best and come up with your own system that works for you. Then stick to it, improve it, and never stop becoming greater.

EVERYTHING IN THE WORLD WAS CREATED TO IMPROVE, GROW, AND EVOLVE. Humans just have an incredible ability to evolve and learn at a much faster pace than the rest of life around us.

As you become a greater version of yourself, you must serve at a higher level. The more in shape you get, the more money you make, the more success you experience the MORE HUMBLE AND A SERVANT LEADER you must be.

All those things of success don’t improve your inner world, they expose it. 

That's the paradox that confuses so many people. 

Improve all aspects yet as you become greater, become more kind, give more grace, listen more, have more empathy, have more humility, improve your social skills and emotional intelligence. Everyone is going through their own challenges and no one needs to be talked down too because you’ve built a little confidence and supposedly improved for the better. Im tested by all of this each day.

And the whole point of self improvement isn’t to improve so you can get the approval of others or the love of God. So many have ben conditioned in a way were we must do in order to receive. In fact, God loves your right now exactly how you are. 

Then why must I become greater Kyle? All this self-improvment talk, WHY if God loves me exactly how I am right now. 

Well it's because God loves you TOO much to let you merely exist in your life and settle for what you have now because he wants you to experience the fullness and richness of life with all incredible blessings he has for you. Blessings that aren't just materialistic, but blessings that give your soul a sense of peace and meaning. That's why challenges are in your life, just as a father will allow his son or daughter to move through a challenge in order for his child to learn and to become greater, God allows the challenges in order for you to become greater. And really to learn from the challenges so you can lead others who move through the same challenges you overcame. 

I didnt want to come to the point where I got to Heaven to have God show me the life I could of haved but chose not to pursue all because I chose the comfort of the sameness and didn't choose to have courage to pursue the challenges in order to become greater and receive all he had for me. 

Don’t grow so you can get the praise and approvals of others, because they will rarely come. Grow and become for the confidence in yourself, for giving yourself the opportunity to continue to live out the purpose God has created you for.  

Do it for nobody else but you and the people you absolutely love. Love yourself enough to not let yourself die in the valley beause you didnt start the hike to the peaks of life. 

This is for you. This is choosing to LIVE, not merely existing. 

And I can promise you that when you choose to take your power back and work on getting at least 1% better every day, your life will get better. That is just the law of nature. 

Your outer world will reflect your inner world. What you will find in the world will be you. This realization was one of the most amazing gifts life has taught me so far.

Don’t live with the regret as you lay on your death bed that you never picked yourself up, got into the game, and strived for something greater in life.

With all this being said, maybe you resonate with it. I don't want this to be some motivational blog or inspirational blog. I want it to provoke a feeling inside your where you look in the mirror and take your power back. 

You change YOU. You become someone greater than you were yesterday all so you can live out this incredible purpose with your life. To use the gifts and the talents God has given you for you to make the impact you are called to make. This is why self-improvement is a life and death situation.

Choose to live, not merely exist. Become and express the greatest version of yourself. 

That is what the world craves from you.

And if you think no one believes in you, I do. 

You got this. We got this. 

Keep going. 

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